Grand Cafe Surrenders to Casual Dining Vogue: Presumably changing name to "Mostly Above Average Cafe." [Eater SF]
Woman Accused of Breeding Rat Army: Was this just a ploy to give Batkid someone new to fight? [SFist]
San Francisco is America's 5th Most Fit City: This calls for celebratory donuts. [SF Gate]
Man Returns $125,000 That Fell Off Armored Truck: In other news, apparently stuff just falls off of armored trucks? Is all that armor actually good for anything? [SF Gate]
Google Bows to Europe's Privacy Laws: "Right to be forgotten" wins in the end. [TechCrunch]
Should You Go Out Tonight: The Flowchart: Somehow whenever we follow this we end up going directly to jail without passing Go and collecting $200. [Bold Italic]
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