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Cool Grey City of Football: Week 14

Jeremy Dorn | December 9, 2013 | Lifestyle Story City Life

It's hard to be a Grinch after your team takes down the top team in the NFL, but that is the reason for my existence. So, after I give a big victory chest bump to the rest of Niner Nation—gives online chest bump—let's get down to business: My issue this week, besides a significant lack of sideline whining by the evil Pete Carroll, is Colin Kaepernick.


There's no question the dude can out-run, jump and throw almost anyone in the NFL, but when he doesn't utilize his legs and only chucks the ball into triple coverage, all that potential he was hyped for never grows. Let’s take yesterday’s win for example. Kaepernick threw a touchdown pass to Vernon Davis, but also missed an easy throw to Michael Crabtree in the red zone that would have given the 49ers a 10-point cushion. Oh, that throw was intercepted by a Seahawk who looked like a Pee Wee football player most of the game. Kaepernick also went 15-29, meaning he completed just over 50 percent of his passes. Russell Wilson, despite playing only slightly better than Kaepernick, proved he was the better QB by constantly making better decisions on his way to a 60 percent completion rate. Statistically speaking, Kap is one of the worst quarterbacks in the league this season.

That the 49ers are 9-4 and in the driver's seat for a playoff spot is a testament to the overall talent they possess. We know Kaepernick has all the physical tools in the world, but a recent x-ray of his head showed a lump of mashed potatoes surrounded by more hot air than a Jim Harbaugh sideline freak-out. That’s bad. Trust me, it’s science.

Even with all that nonsense, the Niners have made it this far with a very mediocre quarterback, so they will probably snag a playoff spot after all. But beating the Seahawks might turn out to be the crowning achievement in a disappointing 2013 season. Because if you actually think Kaepernick is going to win playoff games in Carolina, New Orleans or Seattle, you may need your head x-rayed too.

At least nostalgic 49ers fans can root for old friend Alex Smith and his 10-3 Kansas City Chiefs. If you squint, you might think that red jersey is still sporting a 49ers logo.

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