First it was Guy Fieri’s Lamborghini, then came Huey Lewis’ rental car: you don’t have to be a detective to notice that celebrities in Marin are at high risk for getting their wheels stolen. Fieri’s screaming yellow ride was allegedly commandeered by a 17-year-old Tiburon resident who is accused of rappelling into the luxury dealership where it was kept, and on April 22nd a Mill Valley woman plead guilty in the theft of Lewis’ rented Corolla from a Holiday Inn Express parking lot in Mill Valley. We aren’t hoping to see any copycat crime, but permit us to speculate: which flashy star could be the next high profile car theft victim?
Sammy Hagar: Rock and Roll Hall of Famer and Mill Valley resident Sammy Hagar should cling tight to those keys. The former Van Halen singer represents the logical extreme of Fieri’s hard-rock, hair-dyed aesthetic and Lewis’ high vocal rasp, making him a prime target. According to his 1985 hit “I can’t drive 55,” Hagar keeps it fast and furious behind the wheel: if you see his car towing the speed limit across the Golden Gate, call the police, because it’s likely been stolen.
Anthony Bourdain: Fieri’s sworn enemy and a frequent Bay Area food traveller, if Tony has so much as a layover in SF, he should expect his rental car to be stolen and taken to parts unknown. Kitchen Confidential and Medium Raw may have won him praise and fans, but Bourdain’s slander of many famous restaurants could have the industry cooking up a car theft plot against him.
George Lucas: It wouldn’t surprise anybody if this lifelong racecar enthusiast had a few new Formula 1s (or even an X-Wing) in his driveway. You might assume it would take an Indiana Jones inspired raid to steal Lucas’ treasures, but if his recent sale of LucasArts to Disney is any indication, he’s just signing them away these days.
Hall & Oates: When Daryl Hall and John Oates come to the Bay to make our Outside Lands dreams come true, they’ll want to train a few eyes on their tour bus. In fact, the duo’s music has already been appropriated by “CallinOates,” the SF-based viral hotline where you hear hits like “Out of Touch” for free by calling (719) 266-2837. And hey, “Getaway Car” isn’t as catchy as “Rich Girl” but it does seem to indicate that the two are on high alert for theft.
Think you have an idea of which celeb could be next? Tweet your ideas and "tips" @sanfranmag.