This summer has been a strange one for our local waterways. We’ve experienced a few boating mishaps, some water level warnings and a massive invasion of small blue creatures. So what’s up with the Bay lately? Global warming? Downstream effects of the drought? Did we forget to sacrifice a goat at the temple of Poseidon?
Let's review the aquatic antics:
June 8th: Ocean Beach started the summer quietly with a Silent Frisco party in the sand, called Hush Fest. Hoardes of locals kicked off their shoes and put on their headphones to dance and jam silently, plugged into the same DJ. It appeared to be a eerie offshoot of Burning Man. Onlookers remained skeptical.
June 26th: A civil grand jury warned us that San Francisco's waters are nearing the high water mark. The report calls for a citywide plan and change in building code requirements, but we've got housing to build on Treasure Island, the new Mission Bay Medical Center, and haven't you seen our new bridge?
July 27th: An intoxicated paddleboater was rescued after drifting aimlessly near the Bay Bridge. The man was spotted unconscious and rescued by the Oakland Fire Department. As noted, the whole scenario bore a striking resemblance to the plot of The Old Man and the Sea. Well, at least a family resemblance. But mysteries remain: What was the man drinking? Why did he take a paddleboat by himself? Did he not know that the Alameda Ferry serves martinis?
July 31st: Thousands of small, mysterious blue creatures washed ashore on Ocean Beach. They weren't dropped from UFOs, though, they are actually relatives of jelly fish. The creatures are known as vellela and have been dubbed with adorable nicknames like Little Sails and By-the-Wind Sailos. Aw…can’t we keep ‘em? Please?
August 4th: A fishing boat washed ashore on Ocean Beach. The shipwrecked Paloma was found just south of Cliff House (which does serve martinis), abandoned, and leaking fuel. The salmon fisherman piloting the craft is still missing and said to be Timothy Lybrand according to authorities. Search warrants were halted on the everning on the 4th due to the supposed beliefs that Lybrand is actually in hiding from his outstanding warrant. Yikes.
Let's hope this next season brings less odd happenings and better surf breaks.